How grateful I am to have prayers that remind me how loved I am. I slept poorly last night; my mind falling back into the old habit of trying to see around the corner to predict how the pieces are going to fit. It was only prayers that soothed me. Not that I am actively afraid of anything in particular, more like anxious over the uncertainty. My usual.
So, I’m settling in, breathing into allowing. This morning, I tripped across this quote:
“If something isn’t simple, if you must force it or control it to make it so, then it’s not right. The natural order of the Universe flows like a river with no dam. If it does not flow in the direction you want, then maybe what you “want” isn’t what you “need.” Building a dam to control the flow only serves to kill all that river had to offer. Let your life be simple and I promise, you will find happiness and peace.”
It reminded me once again, that I do not know what anything is for. I look at a friend and recognize that what she called disappointment over things “not working out” was in fact a turning point, the impetus that allowed her to discard some of her people-pleasing tendencies; to live more authentically. Unwittingly, it caused her let go of trying to be someone she wasn’t.
As I move into hearing what direction I should be moving in, I hunker down into God’s love, for it is only there that the fear cannot take root. It is only there that I fall into whatever is happening and remember that I don’t need to control any of it. I can go with the flow. I can trust.
In the wee hours of the night, I read:
I am without fatigue. I am without exhaustion. I gladly share with you from my storehouse of stockpiled energy. My vitality is your vitality. My radiant health is your health. Depend on me. As a loving parent leads a child with a tender hand, so will I lead you. One step at a time, never too quickly or with haste, I will bring you where you need to go. You are exhausted from trying to reach your objectives without me. Do not strive to be without me. Depend on me in all things. Allow your heart to be carried within my greater heart. Allow yourself to rest in my gentle custody. You are my beloved child. I cherish you.¹
So, I am breathing into prayers of solace. As I walked the neighborhood this morning, passing out flyers, I gave thanks for the gentle breeze and remembered yet another prayer:
This earth is my gift to you. Its million beauties are to be a solace to you. Consider the glory of the setting sun. Enjoy the moonrise. Daily I bring the breeze to freshen your spirit. I bring birdsong and the scent of flowers. In all these things, in all these ways, I comfort you. I have made you a sensitive creature. Your moods are like weather. When they trouble you, come to me. Allow me to be your weather. Enjoy the sunshine of my companionship. Bask in the gentle breeze of my understanding.²
It was my meditation and my exercise all rolled into one. It was a reminder to let go of trying to control anything and just allow God to lead; to just trust I will be provided for.
At my open house today, I arrive wishing I had eaten more breakfast and wondering how I could possibly get through the next three hours without the bag of almonds I’d forgotten on my kitchen table. Within minutes, the tenant offers me one of the burgers her ex had picked up for lunch. (It’s only 11:00 a.m.) Relishing the nourishment and God’s reminder that I am provided for, I finish. Five minutes after I have finished eating, I notice that I am still a little hungry, but figure at least I won’t be famished. A few minutes after that, her ex walks in and offers he yet another; enough to satiate.
God is good.
So, I am prayerful. Why do I think I need to control anything?
What tiny blessings are reminders of how you are provided for? Are you remembering to stop and appreciate them?
Namaste, my friends, Namaste.
¹Cameron, Julia (2008-09-18). Prayers to the Great Creator: Prayers and Declarations for a Meaningful Life (pp. 529-530). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.
²Cameron, Julia (2008-09-18). Prayers to the Great Creator: Prayers and Declarations for a Meaningful Life (p. 513). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.